Well folks, sorry there has not been a post for a while, a written one I mean; the reason for this is that we had a bit of a problem with aardvarks. Now
Aardvarks are damn annoying, just the other day I was talking to some one about aardvarks and we found that we both had a problem with aardvarks. Its not so much the double a at the beginning of their name, but the fact that they are infesting our houses. Yes folks aardvarks have been found in as many as one in every four homes in urban areas. This is starting to be so much of a problem for people that they have come up with many possible techniques for getting rid of them. My friend tried keeping a sledge hammer at hand, but that just took too long, you know, so many aardvarks so little time. Then he tried pouring battery acid on the floor, but the bridges he made to get around were not as stable as he liked and, as he said, "it's really hard on socks, not to mention the fumes. Also, if you have carpet this might not be the best idea." I suggested using tar, to stick those varmints to the floor where they stand, but I did have the same issue with the walkways. What really needs to be done, to make this pouring on the floor method feasable, is someone needs to design a contraption that would lift you out of the gunk on the floor, or out of you bed, chair, where ever you happen to be, and carry you around. I tried ropes from the ceiling, but that doesn't work out so well, and my friend uses ceiling fans too get around and that's worse. It is getting so bad at my house that I have been thinking about moving, maybe out of the city, the country some place, but then my friend told me that it is even worse out there.
"Aw shit man, what am I going to do!?"
"There's nothing we can do, by the weeks end we'll be up to our necks in aardvarks."
Image courtesy of Tom Brown of Baltimore, from the Brown Mega Corporation (I didn't actually ask permission to use it, so please don't let him know, and visit his site if you want, it's pretty cool.) [edit: it has come to our attention that the blog previously found at the links in this foot note is no longer operational. YOU CAN NO LONGER VIEW WORK BY TOM BROWN. THIS IS YOUR ONLY WARNING. The blog has been removed, not my fault, sorry]
