Fenwick: Part I

"Goddammit" Fenwick mumbled, "I'm awake"
He looked down and saw he had no pants.
"I have no pants" he said dumbly
"It's dark out" he continued in a similar vein-again stating the obvious.
"I should get up"
He fell back asleep

"Goddammit" Fenwick mumbled, not realizing he had said this just a couple of hours before, "I'm awake"
He looked down and again saw he had no pants. Again this surprised him.
"Why am I not wearing pants?" he asked, of no one in particular.

A man walked up to him, looking concerned.
"Are you okay sir?"
"I don't have pants"
"You look shaken up, are you all right?
"I don't have pants"
"Yes I see that"
"Where are my pants?"
"What?"
"You heard me, I want my fucking pants"
"I think you are delirious, sir"
"I'm not delirious, I just don't have pants is all"
It was not in fact strange that Fenwick found himself having conversations of such intellectual caliber and, using his logical reasoning, he was clearly winning the debate
"Give me my fucking pants, you retard" he yelled persuasively. 
However persuasively he yelled the man of intellectual caliber only nodded and smiled and wrote things down, not looking intellectual but more like the retard that Fenwick had labeled him. Looking intellectual wasn't the point. If you acted intelligent people would ask you to do things like triangulate graphs and quote Nietzsche and Kant, and tell them the periodic table and the atomic count of their phones; there would be no end to it. So he tried not to act too intelligent and got by most of the time, but sometimes that didn't work and he had to let his intelligence show. Like right now with this fucking lunatic, (hey he was the one who started the swearing-ok? That stuff was contagious.) yelling about pants.
"Yes, I understand sir, but I don't have your pants"
"Then why do I not have pants on right now?"
"Maybe I didn't take them" he had to be patient, these things take time.
"Um."
"Maybe you lost them." The man of intelligent caliber suggested, helpfully. Or so he thought.
"What? Oh"
This had not occurred to Fenwick before.
"Sorry, that hadn't occurred to me."
"No problem" the man said. 


To be Continued.......in part Two